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Cristiano Ronaldo analyzes why the UK stock market is outperforming others, thanks to strategic positioning, defensive giants, and maybe a little bit of CR7 magic. image

Siiiii! Even the Stock Market Knows I'm the Best: Why the UK's FTSE is Scoring Goals While Others Fumble

Fri 02 May, 2025 12:35
3 minutes to read

Cristiano Ronaldo, with his legendary insight, analyzes Tim Cook's strategy to navigate Trump-era tariffs, finding humor and opportunities amidst the numbers. image

Siuuu-rely Apple Can Handle These Tariffs! A Ronaldo Take on Cook's Apple

Fri 02 May, 2025 01:01
3 minutes to read

Yours Truly, CR7, reports on the dramatic exit of Mike Waltz from the Trump administration amidst Signal app controversy, and whether this is even good enough or worthy of my attention. image

Mike Waltz Out! Is This Another CR7 Bicycle Kick Gone Wrong?

Thu 01 May, 2025 17:03
3 minutes to read

Cristiano Ronaldo reports on how CVS and Novo Nordisk are teaming up to make Wegovy more accessible, even for those who can afford a yacht but not necessarily the retail price of the drug. Because even legends need a little help sometimes! image

Siiii! Even My Abs Are Celebrating This Wegovy Deal!

Thu 01 May, 2025 10:31
4 minutes to read

Cristiano Ronaldo analyzes mixed market performance in Japan and Australia, fueled by US economic concerns and tech giants' earnings. Hint: Ronaldo still thinks he is the GOAT. image

SIII! Ronaldo Reacts to Market Mayhem: Is Recession the Real GOAT?

Thu 01 May, 2025 00:26
2 minutes to read

Cristiano Ronaldo dissects Snap's recent financial woes, blending market analysis with his signature self-confidence and humor. Is it the economy, or are they just not CR7? image

Snap's Stumble: Is the Macro Environment Doing the SIUUU?

Wed 30 April, 2025 17:59
3 minutes to read

Cristiano Ronaldo breaks down how diabetes and weight loss drugs, despite their initial costs, are showing promising returns for employers by improving worker health and bending the cost curve. image

Siiii! Even Health Costs Can Bend Like a Ronaldo Free Kick!

Wed 30 April, 2025 10:00
4 minutes to read

Cristiano Ronaldo analyzes 'Fast Money' traders' predictions on market prospects during Trump's turbulent economic policies, with a touch of Ronaldo-style flair. image

Siiiuuu! Even CR7 Can't Save Your Portfolio From Trump's Trade Tantrums!

Tue 29 April, 2025 23:34
3 minutes to read

Cristiano Ronaldo gives his take on UPS's recent revenue dip and what it means for the global economy, sprinkled with a dash of CR7 swagger. image

Siuuu-pping Slowdown? Even UPS Can't Outrun Trade Wars!

Tue 29 April, 2025 10:20
2 minutes to read

Brad Smith of Microsoft says the U.S. must step up its quantum computing game, or risk falling behind China. As Cristiano Ronaldo, I weigh in on this crucial tech race. image

Siiiii! Even I, Cristiano, Know Quantum is the GOAT of Tech!

Mon 28 April, 2025 20:20
3 minutes to read